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Post by Juxapose on Apr 12, 2013 14:06:32 GMT -5
One very difficult thing I find about other people's fanfics is that they can be a drag to read. Unless the reader and writer are in the same level, sharing stories can be more of a chore than a good time. Especially some fics on Fanfiction.net that goes on forever and still never found a purpose. I still see fics that have themes that go way to dark, and have content that does not have any relation to a Harvest Moon game. I know that many games have open spots to fill with creativity, but I didn't imagine plots of betrayal and murder as every character's backstory.
So on my time off, I plan to read a few chapters of a fic on Fanfiction.net, and I will discuss my opinion of it.
Note: I will not be saying what Fic or writer I will be commenting on. Don't want any bruised egos.
Fanfic #1
This fanfic seems to have promise when I saw the Summary. But things go WAYYYYYY downhill as soon as I start reacding the actual content. First proble I see is that the fic goes a bit off-canon. Using Harvest Moon names like "Jill" and "Skye" as parents or relatives of other characters who are not related to the characters in the story.
I know that the writer wants to add character, depth, and emotion to the story. But they can overdo it a bit. The games tend to overdo the emotions already; I as the reader don't need the writer to surpass the original content. Just tell the story already.
Another common mistake is the details tend to go on and on and on and on. I love to read books, and most mainstream writers keep details simple, allowing the events to unveil more details about the characters and what they are doing. I hate reading five paragraphs about what a character is doing, and the story never moves.
I know that when people write, they typically write what's on their mind. But when making fanfics, I really wish people keep in mind the age group the original source material is aimed at. Foul language and Harvest Moon/Pokemon don't really mix that well. It can work during high peaks of emotion, cause trust me, we all curse at the game every now and then. But when every character is casually shooting off f-bombs for no reason, I don't know what I am reading anymore.
Another problem I see in fanfiction is how more than half of the story doesn't even take place in the world stated in the summary. If the story takes place in a particular game, I would rather the story be kept there. Events that may lead to the main story is just fine, but when people make up new towns, and write full blown chapters that take place there gets me lost. At least in the canon villages, I have a better idea where everyone is and what everyone is doing.
Changes in PoV is a bit hard to follow. Many books do tend to do this, but these are professional writers for crying out loud. Even I can't fully handle writing a story where PoV is moving back and forth between like 5 or 6 people. And when the PoV occasionally moves to "No one", it makes reading harder.
Well, I got to Chapter 2 of the 34 Chapters of the fic. The story is hard to follow, and I don't feel like I am reading a Harvest Moon fic with so much references to blood, rape, and violence. Maybe the next fic will handle itself much better.
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Post by Butterscotch on Apr 12, 2013 14:20:19 GMT -5
Oh yes, this. It can be quite jarring. I think that the less you swear, the more effective it is.
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Post by Juxapose on Apr 17, 2013 14:51:44 GMT -5
I read a new fanfic today It was a short one shot fic. A fic about a date between Claire and Grey.
Unlike the previous fic, I actually like this one. It was short, cute, and to the point. It was a bit tough to read with lots of poetic imagery. Had to re-read a few lines to see where something was going. But the fic was fun, properly detailed, and ended with sort of a cliffhanger, but enough to allow the reader to assume what will happen after the fic is over.
Kudos to this writer! It was romantic, but not too much to make me roll my eyes in disbelief. I'll make sure to leave a review to encourage this writer to keep working on his/her talent.
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Post by Juxapose on May 4, 2013 6:27:12 GMT -5
So today I read another one-shot Fanfic. It was a story about Ann's father from Magical Melody, and his fear that he may lose Ann in the same way he lost his wife.
I liked this fic for the most part. It was short, VERY detailed, and was easy to read with non-poetic lines. Because the fic had so much elements of death and sadness, the story left me feeling a bit blue. But that's not a bad thing at all. The story's genre matched, and it played it's role well.
I do have a couple of issues. I must say that the story's moral is a bit askew. You lost your wife in a tragic accident, you fear that your child may suffer the same fate. Yet you never stop your child from doing the same dangerous activities that killed your wife. Only other issue is that the wife death scene can get a bit gorey. Shards of metal splitting skulls and blood is a bit much for a Harvest Moon fanfic. But that's mainly me and my Hemophobia.
Still, Kudos to this writer. Too bad this writer hasn't written too much yet. I reviewed her work, and hopes that she writes a bit more.
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Post by Butterscotch on May 4, 2013 7:02:08 GMT -5
I don't see how the moral is askew? Ann is an adult, and her father has to let her make her own decisions and mistakes. Unless the story takes place when Ann is still a child, in which case, yes, Doug should restrict her from dangerous activities.
Can I get a link?
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Post by Juxapose on May 4, 2013 15:05:48 GMT -5
I say that because it felt like Ann's father allowed her to work on machinery since she was a child. Allowing one to make a decision as an adult only applies when the person in question has already reached the age of adulthood. Since the fic states that Ann lost her mother of a tragic and grulesome accident at an early age, you would think her father would drive away any intentions of being an inventor while she still a child. Link to Fic is right here: www.fanfiction.net/s/4222816/1/Fear-of-Loss
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Post by Butterscotch on May 5, 2013 9:35:11 GMT -5
Hm, having read it, I do see your point. A parent shouldn't allow a child to do very dangerous things. On the other hand, this is Ann's true passion in her life and a good parent should encourage their child to follow their dreams, even if it takes them down a dangerous path.
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Post by TBustah! on Nov 24, 2015 2:44:28 GMT -5
I'm a terrible writer, but once in a while, there's a turd that even I can smell. Unless it's a small community, I'm just brutally honest.
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