Skeep
Large Milk
Posts: 102
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Post by Skeep on Apr 25, 2006 21:55:57 GMT -5
Chapter One: Her Secret Thoughts[/u]
No one knew her thoughts. No one would've guessed them either. Everyone expected her to like her big friend. The one she talked to daily, the one she brought gifts to for no apparent reason. But that wasn't the case at all. No, her eyes were set on someone else.
Gwen reached up and tucked a piece of her blonde hair behind her ear. Her maroon eyes were closed as she pet the horse infront of her. When the girl moved to Flower Bud Village, they had taken away her horses. She had been devastated. Fortunately, the new farmer came to her rescue. The girl was quite nice, and let Gwen come and practically half own the horse she was now stroking. "Gwen, time to close up." She heard someone calling to her. "I'm coming, Z!" Gwen shouted back. The voice belonged to the farmer, who's name was Zoey. Gwen often called her Z, though. "I'll see you later." She whispered into the horse's ear. "Fox out, Chica." Gwen said, saying her own special goodbye. The black horse's name was Isobella, but Zoey called her Is and Gwen called her Chica.
Gwen walked out of the barn and shut the doors tightly. She waved to her new friend and walked back towards the town. The slight breeze picked up to make things windy. She reached up to pull her hair behind her ear once again as she felt rain drop onto her hand. "Mmm.. Rain.." She whispered, for Gwen was a girl who loved rain. Instead of returning to her uncle's inn, she walked over to the dock and sat down. A dolphin came up and nudged Gwen's foot, which was hanging over the water. The girl had befriended most of the wild animals, but the dolphin was her favorite of all. The squirrel came close, but no one could be her dolphin. "So, storms coming?" She asked getting the hint. She stood up, patted the dolphin, and started into town.
Gwen spent most of her time out in the forests and near the beach, so she didn't really know her way through the town. Dark clouds rolled closely towards the town, as if racing each other to see who could reach it first. "Dang this wind." She mumbled, though she couldn't hear herself over the howl of the wind. Things started getting darker, and suddenly Gwen didn't know where she was.
The girl started to tell that she wasn't going in the right direction. She quickly whirled around and pain seered through her head, leaving her helpless on the ground. Everything went black as she reached out a hand, as if in a silent call for help.
(What do you think? Should I continue?)
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Post by Butterscotch on Apr 25, 2006 22:03:18 GMT -5
This seems good so far, though I noticed one mistake. You wrote Mineral Town, instead of Flower Bud Village (I made the same mistake once in Dream About Me ^^; )
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Post by melody on Apr 25, 2006 22:08:25 GMT -5
Wow, this is really good! Please continue.
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Skeep
Large Milk
Posts: 102
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Post by Skeep on Apr 25, 2006 22:08:48 GMT -5
(xD Dang me =P Thanks alot <3 -runs to fix that- And I think I'll be writing alot tonight.. or atleast another chapter. I'm just in a writey mood ^^ This is actually my first HM fanfic, though I've wanted to do them for a while)
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Skeep
Large Milk
Posts: 102
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Post by Skeep on Apr 25, 2006 22:19:04 GMT -5
Chapter Two: Rescued
His dark hair was drenched as he walked calmly through the storm, though it was turning to a hurricane. The red bandana tied around his neck turned dark red with water, just as soaked as his hair. "Oof!" He said, tripping over something. He found himself face first in mud, his feet still caught on the thing he tripped on. The guy got back on his feet and whiped his eyes of any mud remaining, and the rain took care of the rest. "What the-" He said, staring down at the ground. At his feet was Gwen, a girl he had talked to a couple of times.
Dan reached down and shook her a couple of times, but she didn't move. "Gweeenn..." He moaned, getting down to hoist her onto his back. He was a bit worried about the girl, but he couldn't imagine what he could do with her. The clinic surely would've closed. The main problem was, Dan was a wanderer, and didn't even have a house there, so he couldn't take her to his place. "The inn." He mumbled, remembering he was Doug's neice.
Dan carried Gwen through the rain, not flinching once at thunder or lighting. After a while he moved her around so it looked like he was giving her a piggy-back ride. The rain felt like it was turning minutes to hours. Finally Dan saw the sillouette of the inn coming into view. "Thank goodness." He sighed, feeling he wouldn't be able to hold her much longer. Dan often portrayed to be a strong man, but he really couldn't hold much. Five urgent knocks on the door got Doug to come and open it. "What have you done?!" He heard the man shout, but Dan didn't care as he just walked in and set her down on a bed in the back.
After a while, Doug finally got the story straight on how Dan had only found her and brought her here. Well, he tripped over her, but he decided he'd rather withhold that information. "Now you better be tending to her. I'll stay until she wakes." He said, sitting himself down on a stool infront of the counter. It was then that Doug was reminded that Gwen needed his help and he rushed off to leave Dan alone.
(Yeah.. might sound a little boring at the moment, but I have a plot twisting in my head xD Be patient <3)
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Skeep
Large Milk
Posts: 102
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Post by Skeep on Apr 26, 2006 21:05:05 GMT -5
Chapter Three: Swimming in Questions
When Gwen awoke, she tried to sit up quickly. Her hand rushed to her head as she felt it ache with pain. "Oooh.." She groaned, slowly laying back down. Her eyes opened and she looked around. "Home?" She mumbled to herself questioningly, realizing she was in one of her uncle's rooms in the inn. She turned her gaze to see a guy standing two feet away. "ACK!" She said, almost falling off of the bed. It took a moment for her vision to clear until she noticed it was Dan. Gwen had to fight with herself to keep from blushing.
Dan apologized for frightening her, but Gwen shrugged it off. "I just wasn't expecting someone to be there." She said, quite truthfully. She hadn't even sensed someone was there, which was unusual. "So yeah.. what.. exactly.. happened?" She asked slowly, feeling a bit awkward. "I think you ran into a tree." Dan said, giving her a grin. Gwen wanted to melt when he grinned at her. Dan was the one. The one she thought about constantly. He showed up the same day she had, and she'd been thinking about him ever since. No one suspected it, but sometimes she wished someone knew. Suddenly Gwen realized that she forgot to reply to him while she was thinking.
"Dang I'm stupid." She said, forcing a laugh. The laugh caused pain to seer through her head, and her hand reached up once more. "S-Sorry.." She mumbled, studdering a bit. The pain was unbarable. How hard had she hit that tree?! "You okay, girl?" Dan asked, taking a step closer. Dan knew her name was Gwen, but he called most girls girl, babe, or chick. He was just one of those guys. Gwen tried to nod, but it hurt too much. "Can you get.. Doug?" She asked, opening her eyes slightly, soon enough to see Dan shake his head. "Doug had to go out, told me to watch over you." He said.
Dan? Watching me? How long had he been there? What was he thinking? Thoughts like these rushed through Gwen's head, but they made things alot worse. "I need.. ice.." She mumbled, closing her eyes. Dan got up and grabbed some ice, coming back moments later. "How'd I get here?" Gwen asked, putting the ice on her head. "I.. carried you." Dan said, his face turning a little red. Wait, did he just blush? Gwen couldn't help but blush too. "Thanks, Dan." She whispered. Could Dan like her too?
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Post by Butterscotch on Apr 26, 2006 21:37:36 GMT -5
This seems cute so far; I like stories that a) don't focus on Jack or Jill b) mix up the couples a little
This has both, and is well written ^^
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Skeep
Large Milk
Posts: 102
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Post by Skeep on Apr 26, 2006 21:44:38 GMT -5
Thanks ^^ I wanted to write this chapter during study hall so bad, but they somehow had it blocked! I was so mad x3 It has the most random sites blocked. Like, I go on another proboards site there, yet it wouldn't let me on this one. I practically growled at the screen XD
But yeah ^^ Everyone has someone going after Jack and Jill (Zoey in this one) But I'm just gonna have her be a friend to Gwen. And I was looking through the characters to find who an unlikely couple would be - and in this one.. I have some things up my sleeve xD
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Skeep
Large Milk
Posts: 102
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Post by Skeep on Apr 26, 2006 22:06:55 GMT -5
Chapter Four: Time Long Forgotten
Gwen finally recovered after a couple days of rest. Turns out Dan was right - she had run into a large limb of a tree. She still had a bruise to prove it, but she often kept her bangs in the way to hide it. Dan visited her each day for a little bit, bringing in food for her from Doug who was up front. Each day, Gwen would blush as she heard the bell of the front door, knowing it was Dan coming in. Gwen would have to hide her face under the blankets until her color returned to normal before looking at Dan.
Now she was better and she returned to Zoey's farm to be with Isobella. The farmer walked out of the chicken coop as Gwen came up. "Hey Gwen, you feeling better?" Zoey asked, walking over to her. Zoey had visited her once, feeling horrible that she hadn't sent Gwen home earlier. Gwen nodded and gave Zoey a small smile. "Fine, Z." She said, her eyes glancing at the barn. "Would you like to ride Iz today?" Zoey asked. Gwen's eyes lit up instantly and she nodded.
Gwen got on the horse bareback and didn't bother with any reins. She loved to feel the horse beneath her with nothing in the way. She loved to grasp the horse's mane as they galloped around. It had been so long since she did that. "Let's go, Chica." She whispered, and the horse started trotting off down towards Sunny Lake. It wasn't too long until Gwen had her into a canter. They were galloping up to the lake by the time they reached it, and Gwen stopped Isobella and slid off in one graceful movement. "You have a way with horses." She heard a familiar voice behind her say.
Gwen whirled around to see Dan behind her. She tried her hardest to keep from blushing. "Horses are my friends, my hobby, my life." She replied, meaning it whole heartedly. Dan looked over at Isobella, but didn't advance towards her at all. "That's cool." He said, turning his attention from the horse to the girl. Gwen grinned and started talking to Dan about horses. They led Isobella around as they talked, and then their conversation trailed off into random things. "Well, I better be heading back." Dan said, looking up at the sky. The sun had just set and the moon was starting to rise. Gwen's eyes widened. She had completely forgotten to watch time. She had to get Chica back. "It was nice talking to you!" She said, her words rushed as she jumped onto the black horse. "Fox out!" She said, galloping away. Gwen let out a sigh as she looked back at Dan for one last time before she headed off to Z's farm.
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Post by MONKEY ME on Apr 27, 2006 12:23:09 GMT -5
Wow! What a great story! I love it it is soo cool! Is this Magical Melody or Save The Homeland?
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Skeep
Large Milk
Posts: 102
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Post by Skeep on Apr 27, 2006 16:30:40 GMT -5
Magical Melody ^^ I don't think there is a Dan in Save the Homeland oO; Haven't played it in the longest time though. -glances at brothers room that has PS2 in it- Yeah xP
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Post by Butterscotch on Apr 27, 2006 23:14:32 GMT -5
This is really cute ^^
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Post by Limegreen Queen on Apr 29, 2006 12:14:38 GMT -5
I agree with Butters, this is cute! I like it because it has Gwen in it.
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Skeep
Large Milk
Posts: 102
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Post by Skeep on Apr 29, 2006 17:51:33 GMT -5
Thanks everyone ^^ It's definitely my first one and I'd like to make improvements next time I do one, but I'm liking this so far =P Just as long as I can keep the main plot in my mind xD O, and this next chapter is just mainly about Gwen.. I guess building her character more ^^ (I'm making going to make up random things, so don't expect her to be fully in character =P)
Chapter Five: Life in the Winds
No sun streamed in the window to wake her up, but Gwen was up at six as usual. She stretched and winced as she was reminded of her pain with the throbbing of her head. She sighed and pulled up her knees, burying her head in them. She wanted to just sit there and cry, but her body turned and she was soon standing on the floor. The girl walked over to her window and opened it up. There was rain falling, and the grey clouds in the sky gave her soft comfort. Turning her head to the door and hearing her uncle up, she decided she didn't want to talk to anyone today. Not even Dan. She used her hands and hoisted her up out of the window, jumping down and landing swiftly on the ground.
The rain hit her face, but it wasn't a bitter, stinging rain. It was soft and she needed the rain to cleanse her of her thoughts. All this free time on her hands had given Gwen time to really think. She thought of why she came to the village, about her past, about her future, about everything. Sometimes she would think about Dan or horses, but they were soon pushed out of her mind by other thoughts. Gwen gave the house one last look before running towards the path leading to the pond at the top of the mountain. There was a stone statue there of a beautiful lady, which few knew about it. And though Gwen knew a statue could never hear her, she talked to her anyway.
Reaching the edge of the pond, she sat down and pulled off the flip flops she had been wearing. She stuck her feet in the water and looked up at the statue. She was on an island in the middle of that pond, and she had a sorrowful look on her face, matching the one Gwen had on her own. "Statue.. I've been thinking about my family lately.. Why did they leave me?" She asked, looking up at the statue. Now her tears blended in with the rain streaking down her face.
Gwen's parents hadn't had anything that was wrong with them, or atleast Gwen thought so. They didn't do anything that most 'bad' parents did. She was distant from them for her own reasons, but she didn't seem to have huge problems with them. Her brother and her got along - or so she thought. She didn't like being in the house. Was that enough to make them think she didn't love them and leave? "I was out.. with my horse.. it was raining, just like this." She started. "I fell.. and got hurt. My horse, Seb, he got me home safely. When I went inside, they were.." Gwen said, stopping to sob. She pulled up her knees and buried her head in them, once again. Her arms were crossed and on her knees, the only thing separating her head from her knees.
"They were gone.." She said, finally lifting her head up to look at the statue. "They never came back." She whispered hoarsely, not taking her eyes off of the statue. The tears stopped coming from her own eyes when she could've sworn she saw one come from the statue's. It's just rain. Gwen thought to herself bitterly. But the statue had offered her comfort, whether it had cried or not. Statue's can't cry anyway. She thought, getting mad at herself. Gwen could've sworn she heard a voice say, 'Are you sure?' But she ignored it and stood up. "Thank you." She mumbled, turning and running off towards the inn. She had her friends now, she had Chica, she didn't need her family.
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Post by Limegreen Queen on Apr 29, 2006 19:46:16 GMT -5
This is flippin kewl man! Right more please!
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